Dear You

I hardly think of where I want to see myself at the end of the day, let alone next year. I want to be more ambitious but I need the extra push. I picked up the book This Year I Will... and one of the chapters the author has an exercise to write a letter to your future self one year later. I wanted to gloss it over but I can't deny no matter how much older I get, there is a handful of things I need to do to keep life balanced and stable, regardless of what comes. Sure I want to hit small goals like use my DSLR more, up my skin regimen, but these are the ones that balance everything for me. I’ve written my future self to keep up with a certain discipline for a better quality of life. Life doesn’t go as planned, anything can happen but as long as the goal stays the same, I’m hoping to look back in 2017 and see what was (and wasn’t accomplished). So here is my 2017 accomplishments in all their glory (or failure, maybe!)  

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Dear Diana,

Wow, Miko was a handful but I can’t believe you stayed positive. Child rearing was never on your list of “goals” but you’re good at it, and you’ve devoted so much time to this girl, her growth and what kind of woman she’ll be. She'll grow up knowing you were a combo of gentle, wise, and strong.

In 2017, you’ve put your phone down more, and turned off the TV sometimes. You actually hit your Goodreads goal! You opened more pages and closed more apps and reading was like meeting an old friend again. 

Pen to paper is a powerful tool. You journaled and stayed on schedule with your planner. Sure there were a few days all you did was write “OPEN PLANNER” but you did it. Your journal kept you focused, creative, stable, and you went to your journal more than Twitter, ha. 

You lost the baby weight plus more. Your body went through some major changes- you carried your second baby, had major surgery and breastfed. You should be so proud of what your body can do and how wonderful it has healed. Remember when you could barely get out bed in the hospital and holding your baby was so painful? Now you get to carry her and go on walks with her.

Getting rid of weight also meant getting rid of stuff at home. You cleaned out your dreaded office that was once a space to have creativity flow has become a storage pile because the garage is too full. A clean space means a clean emotional state, and you (almost) know where everything is. You still have that one drawer that could be over-ambitiously labeled as “junk drawer” but still worthy of using the label maker. 

And you blogged?? Regularly?? They say blogging is dead, but so is ska music but that's never stopped you from listening to it. You were tempted to churn out content for clicks, but you stayed true to your word and stuck with topics, companies and shops you truly loved. 

Through all of this, you’ve done what seems like the impossible at times- you’ve worked on your marriage. Once these things above fall into place, life becomes easier to live, you become an easier person to live with (AMEN), and your marriage is a main focus instead of a distraction. You and Scott buried a son together and now you get to raise a daughter, and while the odds were statistically against you to stay together, you proved them wrong. Don’t forget you’re not just husband and wife, you’re great business partners, and now you get to parent together. Miko will know the gospel through the actions of her parents and their marriage. Thankfully she doesn’t have the glasses gene like you both do. Pat yourselves on the back, then go make out somewhere because you made it through 9 years of marriage. 

Some fun goals to balance it out- keeping a consecutive snapchat with Ashley on the daily. It's a fun way to keep the mundane, well, fun, and keeping up with daily emails with Aline and daily group texts with family. 

And looking back at 2017 and reading this letter, what if I’ve failed? What if everyone sees me fail? Don’t worry about what can't be done, look at what you've did! Happy 2017!