Part 2 of 3 – In Which Our Hero Learns the Daring Task of Determining a Ring Size
Part 1 is here.
Part 1 is here.
At some point the male will be faced with the most challenging task of choosing the ring. Figuring out what ring size she is. Some guys have it easy—they have girlfriends who like jewelry and will know exactly their size. If you are like me, and were not so fortunate, then the following tips will help:
*Borrow one of her rings when she isn’t looking; more than likely she has a class ring or something somewhere; unfortunately it may or may not still fit her.
*Ask her mom. Mom’s are difficult. There’s a 50/50 chance that she may happen to know the size of her finger, but in both cases you are going to let her into your secret, and this may or may not be a good idea. In short: know the girls mom. In my case, I couldn't ask Diana's mom for any advice, because had I did so she would have started to cry every time she saw us together--you can decide if they would have been happy or sad tears.
*Feel her finger while you are holding hands and try and get a general idea for how much bigger or smaller it is next to yours.
*Slip her a drug. When she is unconscious take the proper measurements; when she comes to just say, “Boy, you really can’t handle your liquor!”
Guys will have their own tips to add, I’m sure. The most common (and worst, in my opinion) is to start any sentence with “If we ever get married…”—especially if you have been in the relationship longer than a year. I was wise enough not to do this, but I know many men who still have groin pains for using the word “if” and “marriage” in the same sentence. You never want to treat the idea of marriage as a vague possibility around a woman unless you enjoy being slapped in the face.
(Part 3 is coming tomorrow. Thanks for reading...)